“I’m Gonna Fix This Place.”

The Bear [SEASON 1] (2022)
Created by: Christopher Storer
5/5 

A young chef from the fine dining world returns to Chicago to run his family’s sandwich shop after his brother’s untimely death.

I can not begin to explain how much heart this show has.
All I want is that all the characters in the series to succeed and live their best Chicago life man…

The acting is a 10/10
The Writing is a 10
The cinematography is a 10/10
Plot is 10/10

This show made me hungry and I really want a nice donut now. 

“I see you”

Avatar 2: The Way of Water (2022)
Directed by: James Cameron
3.25/5⭐️ 

Yada Yada blue people
Yada Yada evil corporation of humans coming to steal resources from the blue peoples planet…
Yada Yada… some nice visuals and solid fight sequences occur… 

The +
CGI is dope
Story wasn’t the worst?
Some pretty cool alien on human kills…
Honestly just visually pleasing 
Pretty neat way to explain away the aliens speaking English the whole film I’ll give you that.
The lore around the Navi is pretty interesting honestly.

The —
Too long 
Way too long 
Jesus Christ James Cameron…
EDIT DOWN YOUR FILMS…
Pick a story line and stick to it…
 we don’t need 5 storylines going on at once 
I can’t remember all the characters names I’m sorry 
Also a character survives just to bait you to watch the sequel and I feel they might attempt a redemption arc with a genocidal maniac?

Was it as good as the first?
Not really?
It looked better but I mean a 14 year difference will do that…

Will I watch this film again in theatres?
Probably not 
Will I watch this movie again to refresh myself before the next one? 
Probably?
I’m invested enough in the main characters that I’m curious to see where it all leads so I guess that’s a win for you James Cameron?

That being said it was better than the Batman and I will die on that hill damn it

“I see you”

Avatar (2009)
Directed by: James Cameron
4/5⭐️ 

I am 77% sure I saw this film for the first time 13 years ago today. Man that is more than half my life ago…

The +
– The CGI is honestly still holding up.
– There is just something so enjoyable about the visuals and the characters that I did not mind rewatching this film in anticipation for its sequel.
– When the humans start dying its honestly real satisfying…

The —
– idk… simple story? I cant argue that its a unique story with themes I haven’t seen explored better in honestly better films

“I’m standing by as you requested, although there’s a problem on the horizon. There’s no horizon.”

Rogue One (2016)
Directed by: Gareth Edwards
4.5/5

This movie is Star Wars at its best. 
Even with the reshoots, the footage from the trailers that is missing from the actual film, and the CGI uncanny valley resurrection of deceased actors… it’s still probably my favourite Star Wars film. 
(aside from ESB).

• Things I liked about the film in no particular order: (spoilers for a 6 year old film?)
• The hallway scene at the end… we can finally see why people are scared of Vader.
• The cinematography?
• A serious lack of space wizards.
• The griminess of it?
• The ending where they literally lead into the next film (a film that was over 40 years old at the time) and it being arguably seamless.
• The fact that everyone dies at the end of this film without mercy and the main antagonist gets literally vaporized by a direct hit of the Death Star (I’m not even kidding look it up).
• The fact that Diego Luna can get it  and that he was so good in this that they gave him his standalone tv series and that this show after only 5 episodes is already probably one of the best pieces of Star Wars content released.
• That shot of the Death Star being assembled and how small a star destroyer looks by comparison.
• K2SO.

Aight that’s it… I’m a bit sorry that I exposed myself as a big Star Wars nerd but then again 

“Hey, you watch something nowadays, what is it, huh? Nothing. Its twists, violence, drama, no message. What’s the point? Huh? What are we supposed to learn? Everything I learned about people I learned from Thomas [The Tank Engine].”

Bullet Train (2022)
Directed by: David Leitch
4.5/5 

Spent the last 2 hours of a pretty weird birthday watching this movie in an empty theatre on a Sunday night.
My thoughts in no particular order:
Good Cast
Great Cameos
Very stylized action
Bopping Soundtrack
Felt like Smokin’ Aces meets Snowpiercer
Did not expect to learn this much Thomas the tank engine lore…

Update:
I’ve seen it twice and it’s still entertaining the second time around 

“It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark… and we’re wearing sunglasses…
Hit it.”

The Blues Brothers (1980)
Directed by: John Landis
5/5⭐️

An overly militarized police force attempt to stop a group of musicians on a mission from God…

This film is perfect
Good comedy, Good Music
A 10 out of 10

“White Russian, no ice, no vodka… hold the Kahlua.”
Catwoman (2004)
Directed by: Pitof
1/5⭐️

DISCLAIMER: this movie was on tv and my mum was watching it so I watched it with her…
I did not willingly seek out this film…

Alright let me start this review with a pun as bad as the film itself:
This film is a PITOF shit.
There is not a moment of this film that I would willingly watch again…
The script: bad
The editing: bad
The directing: bad
The CGI: bad
The acting: bad
The basketball scene: god awful and filled with a weird amount of unnecessary sexual tension.
This movie should not exist.
This isn’t even so bad it’s good.
It’s just bad.

The only upside of this film is Halle Berry’s razzie award acceptance speech… that is the only reason this movie was able to get at least 1⭐️
Fuck
This
Movie

“You bled my brother. So now you bleed. You think that I am not a hunter like you. That I am not a threat. That is what makes me dangerous. You can’t see that I’m killing you. And it won’t either.”

PREY (2022)
Directed by: Dan Trachtenberg
4/5⭐️

A Predator lands in the world of the Comanche Nation 300 years ago. Naru, an underestimated member of her tribe with dreams of becoming a hunter has to face this threat that is methodically stalking her family.

Let me start by saying that I think this film deserved a theatre release. The cinematography was dope, action sequences kick ass, the kills absolutely brutal… it was a shame that I had to watch this on a tiny computer monitor but hey c’est la vie…

Something I am really happy was avoided in this film was the fake out trope… you know… when they pretend that a character died off screen but then they turn out to be alive in the final act and help the protagonist. Honestly that trope always felt like cheating to me and I really hate how it devalues the relationship the viewer has with the film… how can I trust that someone is dead if there might be the possibility that they are alive. So shoutout to PREY for just killing people off mercilessly.

I would have probably given this film a way better review if it weren’t for the French characters…
They dragged down the film
Also…
Man at least get French speaking actors because I’m fairly certain that was not French…
But I could also just have undiagnosed brain damage as a result of watching The Tomorrow War last year…
That being said… the Predator dispatched them without pity very soon after their introduction so I guess… no harm no foul?

Lastly, it was refreshing seeing a blockbuster with a majority indigenous cast with no white leads. I really wish Amber Midthunder and Dakota Beavers get more roles because gosh darn it they absolutely killed it!

Go check it out
It’s on Disney+
Or you can torrent it?
But it’s definitely worth the watch and may I say… as good as the original maybe?

“We have watched and guided. We have helped them progress, and seen them accomplish wonders. Throughout the years, we have never interfered… until now.”

Eternals (2021)
Directed by: Chloé Zhao
2.5/5 (+.5 just because the cinematography was not too shabby)

Uhhhhh, so the Eternals are a race of immortal beings who have lived on Earth for millennia and shaped its history and civilizations and now have to fight some aliens or something idk… they were told they can’t interfere with mankind unless these deviant alien things are involved but they do help the humans with technological advancements so I do not know who… or what to believe…

Ok first, what did I like?
1. Cinematography without doubt was the highlight of the whole moviegoing experience.
2. I’m happy to see that Bryan Tyree Henry is getting more mainstream roles (check out ATLANTA)
3. Uhhhh I guess it was nice to see Jack Kirby-esque visuals used well?

Now for the negatives:
1. This whole movie had such awful pacing… now this is not a spoiler but the first 3/4 of the film follow this format; meet new eternal character, flashback to ancient times, some ok fight sequence… rinse and repeat I think 5 times? Maybe 6?
2. I think this might have been better as a Disney+ series honestly.
3. The post credit scene… or was it the mid credit scene? Let’s just say that this actor will have to be on their A game if I am to see the character they are portraying and not just a pretty British boy dating Ted Lasso’s Ex…
4. There are cataclysmic events happening in this film (volcano eruptions, earthquakes…. The earths crust splitting open) and let’s just say that these events should really cause world wide extinction events on their own.

Guys… if Spider-Man No Way Home sucks I’ll be very sad 🙁

Should I also review Shang-Chi?
Idk you tell me fam….

Ok one last good thing with this film… the plot kind of involves a GIANT EGG and I recently discovered a group on the internet where the only word you’re allowed to say/write is “egg” and well… this reminded me of that discovery and made me chuckle a bit.

“My teeth have begun to fall out. The medicine cabinet is now the Brundle Museum of Natural History. You wanna see what else is in it?”

The Fly (1986)
Directed by: David Cronenberg
3.75

Seth Brundle, a brilliant but neurotic human scientist played by the one and only Jeff Goldblum messes around with time travel and after an experiment goes wrong he accidentally fuses his DNA with that of a fly… becoming… the BRUNDLEFLY

Spoilers on a movie that came out in 1986 so you’ve been warned…

Cronenberg hits it out of the park with this incredible film.
The prosthetics,
the shock of seeing an animal turned inside out,
the absolutely iconic set design,
and Goldblum’s best Jeff Golblum impression makes this movie a worthy halloween watch.

This movie is absolute nightmare fuel in some places and I am here for it!

yada yada
go watch it.
It’s on Disney+ I think…

sidenote:
For those who have seen the film:
 How can Brundle afford such a large apartment? 
Its huuuuuuge…
I was a tad jealous. 

DECEMBER 2022 EDIT:
PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS REVIEW WAS WRITTEN BEFORE HE WENT ON A CRAZY ANTISEMETIC TIRADE PRAISING HITLER IN LATE 2022

“Donda, Donda Donda, Donda, Donda, Donda, Donda, Donda Donda, Donda, Donda, Donda, Donda, Donda”

Donda (2021)
Album by: Kanye West
2.5/5⭐️

“This is what happens when you have undeniable talent… but an absolute inability to self critique and/or curate your work”
-me to my reflection in the mirror after I finished listening to the album.

This album felt like a chore to get through.
27 songs, an 1 hr 48 minutes “meh” experience.

I get that it was supposed to be an ode to his late mother but the only time you actually heard her voice she was talking about Kanye. Which to me feels a tad narcissistic but hey what do I know?

My positive thoughts on the album:
The songs don’t sound too bad.
It was nice to hear Jay-Z on a Kanye album.
Releasing a two hour album is kinda ballsy so hat off to ya Ye

Now… some negatives…

This album feels like he had a healthy amount of songs in the barrel and he thought to himself:
“Hey Kanye (yes he speaks to himself in the 3rd person) maybe if I release all these songs at once and there’s a few good singles maybe people will love the album as a whole…”

I enjoyed at most half of the songs on the album but if you were to ask me to name my three favourites I would draw a blank…

Sorry Kanye good singles don’t make a good album, if that were the case The Black Eyed Peas’ album “The E.N.D.” would be considered one of the greatest albums of all time.

This low grade is also due to the annoying stunts Kanye performed to gain some attention for this album. If you knew your album was good, you wouldn’t need any stupid stunts to build hype, word of mouth would have carried the album alone.

In conclusion,
This album is the following:
Rushed
Mediocre
Unoriginal
Generic
Low Risk
Music

I honestly expected more from Kanye.
I’m disappointed.

Go talk to someone Kanye.
Get your house in order.
Then come back with a proper album…

If you want to listen to some good Kanye go check out any of his pre 2016 music…
Special shoutout to: M.B.D.T.F. (2010), The College Dropout (2004), Graduation (2007), and depending on my mood: Life of Pablo (2016) and YEEZUS (2013)

“If there’s one thing that the world needs right now, it’s scientists. We cannot stop innovating. That’s how you solve a problem.”

The Tomorrow war
2/5 ⭐️

Initially I was going to review the tomorrow war when I first saw it a few weeks ago…
But I kept delaying it…
I kept saying:
I’ll do it tomorrow
I’ll do it later
Nah not today… tomorrow

And here we are… weeks later revisiting a movie that is incredibly forgettable but I’ll try my best to paint you a picture of what I remember my viewing experience being like…

Ok so the plot:
Uhhhh Chris Pratt is an American soldier turned science teacher and he is watching football [soccer] with his daughter (I know we are already really stretching the believability of the plot)

So he’s watching the game…
Then the match is interrupted by people from the future arriving in the middle of the field through a wormhole created to allow for time travel to the past to recruit people from this past to fight an alien invasion in the future.
Did you just have an aneurysm?
I know I did.

So Chris Pratt (who may I remind you is a a futbol loving science teacher/former marine) gets conscripted in this future war…
He gets sent to this post apocalyptic future with little to no equipment…
Some action ensures I think?
It’s all a blur…
He meets his daughter in the future?
I think that’s a paradox?
Whatever…
uhhhh…
They come back to the past after fighting these weird aliens in the future… then homie here teams up with his dad (played by JK Simmons who is charismatic in any role he plays) and they find this alien space ship hidden under the ice and they blow up the ship but not before having a hand to hand fight with an alien…
I am not even kidding.

Message of the movie I think was:
“Hey if the ice caps melt… aliens are going to kill us all?”
But then again they did blow up the aliens now so I guess they can just go ahead and keep melting the ice caps now?

Honestly this movie hurt my head.
It’s on Amazon prime… I think?
Ow
I hated this movie more than F9 I’m not even kidding.
This movie is what I imagine a concussion feels like.
(POST 2022 CONCUSSION UPDATE: YES THIS MOVIE FEELS LIKE A CONCUSSION)
Don’t watch unless watching bad movies is your kink.

*cool jazz music plays*
Sixteen Ways (2021)
Album by: @julian.anderson.bowes & @projectwhatever
5/5⭐️

“Whaaaaaat he’s reviewing an album instead of a movie??? WhAt Is GoInG oN?!?”

Full disclosure I am not a music critic by any standard but after listening to this album give or take 6 times from start to end I felt that it was/is my duty to go out and spread the word about it.

I am usually very picky with the music I listen to. I tend to listen to one or two songs on an album and call it a day… occasionally listening to the album as a whole if the first few songs flow nicely or tickle my fancy.

Well…
as I said above…
This album is great!
Just plain awesome.
You know you’re in for a ride less than 10 seconds into the first song (…) and the album doesn’t let up at any point later.

Also I’m a huge sucker for fun song titles so “…” , “….” , and “…..” had me cackling.

Go see some live music and support local artists yo!

Check out their album on: @spotify , @applemusic , or @bandcamp

“I cherish peace with all my heart. I don’t care how many men, women, and children I need to kill to get it.”

The Suicide Squad (2021)
Directed by James Gunn
3.5/5 ⭐️

You: Whaaaaat you’re saying that this movie is only .5 ⭐️ better than F9? You must be high!

Me: Act-CHEW-ally… I think it’s kind of unfair to compare the two.
One is a movie about heists that happen in cars… a film (if you can call it that) you know will be bad as you walk into the theatre so you take what you can from the viewing experience…
The second… is a super hero film with a preceding film that set the bar so low that even if this movie is slightly better people will be applauding it.

Don’t get me wrong the movie is 3⭐️ higher than the David Ayer Damaged Tattoo Joker 2016 Suicide Squad but that doesn’t mean this movie is by any means a masterpiece.

I think my main gripe is that they leaned too much into comedy and gore and over the top-ness…

That being said there were some redeeming things that I can talk about:
1. No one felt safe.
2. Characters were for the most part likeable.
3. Starro was pretty KICK-ASS (this ain’t a spoiler you saw it in the trailer)… though admittedly it may have just been my excitement of seeing the character on the big screen… I personally would have preferred a more grounded final villain but hey gotta take any win you can I guess?
4. Some good memes came out of the movie so hey that always makes me pretty pretty happy
5. And I mean… KING SHARK is a SHARK. (He was without question the standout)

So I don’t know… it’s fine… but I’m not convinced if it’s great?
Would I watch it again?
Maybe?
But I also re-watch a lot of meh movies (The Matrix Reloaded anyone?)

Yeah but who am I to tell you what to do?
Go off
Watch it in theatres?
Or don’t and watch it at home…
Do whatever you want…

“PELIGRO – MINAS means DANGER – LANDMINES!”
F9 [fast and furious 9] (2021)
Directed by: Justin Lin
3/5⭐️

I have no words to describe this movie… all I can say is, and this is somewhat of a spoiler but I’m 75% sure that they spoiled this is in the trailer, but they go to space… THEY GO TO SPACE!!!! WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THIS FRANCHISE????

They flat out drive through a mine field and survive only thanks to the power of family, NOS, and plot armour… what the hell was I watching?

One of the only upsides of the film were Helen Mirren and Charlize Theron who somehow carry this movie with barely 5 minutes of screen time each. This movie would be a 2/5⭐️ if it weren’t for their contributions.
(Charlize Theron even cosplays as Oliver Tree! How about that eh?)

Would I recommend this movie?
I mean… if you go into it knowing It’ll be bad then yeah it’s a fun summer blockbuster.
But I really wouldn’t recommend it to anyone who isn’t absolutely blitzed out of their minds.

“See you tomorrow kid…”

Two Distant Strangers (2020)
Directed by: Travon Free & Martin Desmond Roe
5/5⭐️

A black man, simply trying to get home to his dog gets stuck in a time loop that forces him to relive a deadly run-in with a cop.

This movie is truly something else, its use of the age old Groundhog Day Time Loop formula to get its messaging across is unparalleled.
Whereas in Groundhog Day you leave the movie thinking that the world can be a better place if you’re just nicer to people around you; in this film, without any bluster, you quickly understand that if you are Black (or a visible minority) no matter your actions, the way you dress, or how polite you are, there is a high probability that you will be persecuted by the police and legal system.

Simply put: Police Officers are supposed to serve and protect… not be judge, jury, and executioner. Any cop who doesn’t understand this should retire, or be kicked off the force because they are dangerous and are putting vulnerable peoples lives at risk.

Go watch this film, its on Netflix, its nominated for an Oscar and its only 30 minutes… so instead of sitting in bed scrolling instagram for an hour… go watch this film and then go stare at a wall and think about your place in this world.

“You’ve seen what people do without leadership. They devour one another.”

Snowpiercer (2013)
Directed by: Bong Joon Ho
3/5 ⭐️

The world freezes, the survivors live on a train that travels around the globe, the rich live at the front in luxury, the poor at the back live in dire conditions… a revolution is underway to fight the inequity.

The Good:
There are a lot of good elements in this film.
The cast is spectacular. I mean Chris Evans, Octavia Spencer, John Hurt, Tilda Swinton, Ed Harris… I could go on…
The quality of the acting is also unsurprising given the talented group of actors.
The production design/cinematography is also worth noting. You really feel that you are on this train along for the ride in this revolution against the upper class.

The Bad:
Given that this movie is technically an action film I decided to scrutinize the fight sequences a tad more than I would in a romantic comedy.
The fight sequences are shot in such a choppy way that it is often hard to tell who is fighting who and what is going on on screen without feeling dizzy at the end. You could argue that this is the point but I mean…
Ill give you two examples of movies with fight sequences that are shot in two different ways:
The Raid (2011) had incredibly well choreographed fight sequences and used very long takes and wide shots so you could focus on the fighting happening on screen.
The Bourne Identity (2002) had a lot of shaky cam but it was used in such an efficient way that you felt like you were in the fight alongside Mr. Matt Damon.
Both these movies preceded Snowpiercer so Snowpiercer could have learned from them.
This film did not commit to either style and instead ended up with a movie with good imagery but forgettable fight sequences.

I know I barely touched on the story but… it’s predictable so I don’t want to talk about it.

I don’t hate this movie, but I also don’t love it…
I am indifferent to it and that is, in my eyes, not a redeeming quality.

I mean I guess it is worth a watch, just because it is not my cup of tea does not mean you won’t like it dear reader…
So go get yourself a VPN and watch it on American Netflix

“Ever have one of those nights that starts out like any other but ends up being the best night of your life?”

The World’s End (2013)
Directed by: Edgar Wright
4.5/5 ⭐️

Five reluctant childhood friends embark on a booze-soaked mission to complete a pub crawl they were unable to finish 20 years earlier. As they try to complete their goal they start noticing that the town folks around them are acting stranger than usual… how mysterious.

In this final instalment of the Cornetto Trilogy we follow Simon Pegg and Nick Frost’s parodying and paying homage to body snatcher movies.

The chemistry between the whole cast and Edgar Wright’s directing and quick editing is as always stellar.

Gary King’s (Simon Pegg) fear of growing up and moving on from his high school persona is the driving theme in this movie. At the start I’ll admit that I found his character incredibly irritating, over the course of the runtime he slowly but surely becomes more likeable to the point that I ended up feeling really bad for the fella.

My only gripe:
Its not as good as the first two films in the franchise…
This instalment somehow feels more big budget and too different from the previous two (Shaun of the Dead/Hot Fuzz).
Admittedly it is really hard to top perfection so it should be made clear that this movie is by no means bad and is worth the (re)watch.

Aight…
I guess I still have Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, and Baby Driver on my Edgar Wright binge so stay tuned for those…
or unfollow me…
yeah no maybe the latter is a less annoying option.

“On those high levels you can eat anything you want, but you don’t have anything to wait for. Your mind runs wild.”

The Platform (2019)
Directed by: Galder Gaztelu-Urrutia
3/5⭐️

Goreng (Ivan Massagué) wakes up in The Hole; a vertical prison with one cell per level; two people per cell; only one food platform that descends from above, and two minutes per day to feed.
Those at the top eat to their hearts desire and those below get their scraps. Revolution is inevitable.

First its merits:
The movie has very good cinematography, very often I could be heard saying: “hey that’s a nice shot” or “huh that’s an interesting visual”.
The story is captivating enough that you don’t turn off the movie as it starts (and as someone who’s watched a healthy amount of bad movies… not switching the movie off five minutes in is half the battle)
The acting is also convincing enough that you really believe that the characters are living through life or death situations.

Now for its faults:
The movie devolves into a confusing/unsubtle mess towards the end.
“Wow people in the upper class don’t care about the people below them?”
“If people only took what they needed everyone less fortunate could eat and be satisfied?”
WHAT A CONCEPT!
I also didn’t really need to see depictions of cannibalism done so realistically and I certainly did not need to see someone get defecated on…

Honestly the biggest flaw in this movie (and many science fiction movies nowadays) is that they think they are deeper and wiser than they really are.

Someone did give me an argument that the movie was made for a Spanish audience (watch the movie with subtitles because dubbed movies are never better than the original)…
and I mean yeah sure ok…
if that’s the case…
fine…
I’ll bump up the rating by a bit just because that’s a valid point.

Yeah idk man, it’s on Netflix, it’s not as bad as I make it seem in this review.
Watch it and make up your own mind.

Edit:
Here is another thing I want to bitch about:
The movie seems to be both anti capitalism and anti communism at the same time… so that’s something I guess?

“Today, tomorrow, yesterday, it’s all the same.”

Palm Springs (2020)
Directed by: Max Barbakow
3.75/5⭐️

2 people attend a wedding, get stuck in a Groundhog Day time loop. Forced to experience the same day over and over again… they have little recourse but to fall in love.

I can assure you that the movie is less cheesy and predictable than I make it seem in the above summary.
The chemistry between the two leads (Andy Samberg/Cristin Milioti) is very believable and you continuously root for them through out the film.

One of the only issues is occasional weak pacing. Some scenes go for too long, and some were somewhat unnecessary.
This should definitely not detract you from watching this film, Palm Springs is probably in my top 3 favourite time loop trope films (right behind Edge of Tomorrow)

This is really a perfect movie to watch during during a pandemic where many of our days start to feel repetitive and mundane.

You can find it on Amazon Prime… or Hulu? Do we have Hulu in Canada? I feel like we don’t… I could be wrong though.

“It’s not murder, it’s ketchup”

Hot Fuzz (2007)
Directed by: Edgar Wright
5/5⭐️

High achieving city cop gets promoted and then immediately transferred to a small village by jealous colleagues.
Mysterious deaths and buddy cop shenanigans ensue.

This movie is just… perfect.
Yeah there is nothing in this movie I can bitch about.

Comedy 10/10
Editing 10/10
Music 10/10

Just all around good vibes man 🤙

Watch this movie if you haven’t seen it yet!
Yes I am going through the Cornetto trilogy so “World’s End” is coming up soon!

“You’re breaking up with me because I’m too… blonde?”

Legally Blonde (2001)
Directed by: Robert Luketic
3.5/5 ⭐️

Pink loving sorority girl Elle Woods (played by the iconic Reese Witherspoon) goes to Harvard Law to get her undeserving ex-boyfriend back…

Along the way she learns that being uncompromising, and seeing things from a fresh perspective are incredible skills to have as a practicing lawyer… and that men who dump you because you are too much like Marilyn Monroe and not enough like Jackie Kennedy, are not worth your time and/or attention.

Admittedly the movie is pretty cliché, and you can see the ending coming from kilometres away (I know the expression is miles away… shut up), and early 2000 fashion was definitely questionable, but those gripes don’t take away from the good feeling you’re left with as the credits roll

So uhhh yeah go check it out if you haven’t seen it yet 🤷‍♂️

“Do you want anything from the shop?”
“Cornetto.”

Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Directed by: Edgar Wright
4.75 ⭐️

Christ has risen… no wait those are just very British zombies
(Get it?………..Because it’s Easter Sunday today?)

In this first instalment of the Cornetto Trilogy, we find Shaun (Simon Pegg) a down on his luck Brit who spends too much time at the Winchester Pub.
He tries his best to balance his friendship with Ed (Nick Frost), his hatred for his Step Dad (Bill Nighy), as well as his on again off again relationship with Liz (Kate Ashfield).

One day, people start rising from the dead and a z-word epidemic takes hold of their London neighbourhood. Shaun now has to grow up and set in motion a plan to protect his loved ones… by convincing them to shack up at the Winchester, with a pint and wait for all of this to blow over.

This movie is dope dope dope
Watch it
Sick soundtrack
Slick editing
Solid humour
Witty dialogue
Just great
It’s re-watchability factor is unreal
Uhhhhhh
Yeah go watch it

Billie Eilish: The World’s a Little Blurry
directed by R.J. Cutler
4/5 ⭐️

The movie was a fascinating look at a teenager who shot up to super stardom at a very young age and how they are handling the anxiety and social pressure with the help from their older brother and their family.

Billie Eilish does not shy away from being vulnerable on screen. Her indisputable talent, her relationship with her family, and specifically her older brother Finneas, are the backbone of this movie and is worth watching for that alone.

My only critique is that the second half of the movie lost its momentum a bit, but by that point everyone is invested in the cast of characters so it’s really just a very small nitpicky gripe.

You can find this movie on AppleTV+…
(or at your local torrent shop)